King Midas of Ormond wanted to have gold, so he asked a god about it. The god created him a troll-like imp called Rumplestiltskin, who could turn anything into gold. First, Midas had him turn straw into gold. Then, he had him turn his precious items into gold.
All was good, until Rumplestiltskin ran out of items to turn into gold. He started turning food and drink into gold, then the King’s DAUGHTER! Midas begged for forgiveness and the god had Rumplestiltskin live in Ormond.
A while later, a Lord called Maximus Farquaad swore allegiance to Midas, so Midas granted him a land within Ormond, which Maximus called Duloc. He got eaten by a Dragon, though, so Midas retook that land.
Note: I decided to do this story because I got a Shrek the Musical Gingy puppet from a local charity shop yesterday. This story takes place during Shrek 2, on the day of Shrek and Fiona’s Royal Ball. It also is based on the Disney Cinderella 2 story “An Uncommon Romance” since I think the romance is an allusion to Anastasia’s romance with the local Baker.
Mabel was watching her music box of Cinderella and Prince Stanley dancing over and over again while daydreaming of her own love life. Soon, however, her mother, Lady Macnair, came into the room, with Doris, telling her that the Royal Ball is that night and she wants both her daughters to find someone of noble blood, like a Count or a Duke.
When they were in the Far Far Away town trying to f…
Note: This is a prequel/reimagining of the Shrek franchise.
Once upon a time, in a kingdom far far away, there were 3 royal siblings: Lillian, Uther and Dilys. Dilys, who was the oldest, was born with the ability to do magic and thus she entertained her 2 siblings. Their parents didn’t know how to handle this. The mother, Queen Runkle, disapproved of witchcraft, but the father, King Charming, was tolerant of it. When it got “worse,” when Dilys was a late teen, the King and Queen banished her for it and made Lillian next in line for the throne. Dilys swore vengeance for this someday. She turned herself into a fairy and started granting happy endings for other people, and for this, she was granted the title of Dama Fortuna. Over time though, …
Timiny the Talking Cricket is a character in Shrek. He is based on the Talking Cricket from Pinocchio (fairy tale) and is an allusion to Jiminy Cricket from Pinocchio (Disney film). He is quite feminine, as he always carries a doll around with him. Despite this, he is also quite scary.
He acts as Pinocchio's conscience, showing him to be kind and caring.
In the village of Devonshire, there was a couple who had a business in woodcutting. The woman, named Ashley Alyster, gave birth to twins named Hansel and Gretel, but as time went on, she grew to hate them as she thought them to be the reason they were poor.
One day, she told the twins to go to their grandmother’s house to help her with a few things, with the hope that they’ll get lost. Hansel and Gretel were excited because they had never met their grandmother. On their way, they met their cousin, Little Red Riding Hood, who was on her way to the grandma’s house too.
When they got there, they were met with a surprising sight, the Grandma looked strange, but because they had never met her before, they went along with it. The “grandma” fed Han…
Note: Since Fairy Godmother had this story in Shrek 2, I figured I might as well give my 2 cents on how it happened in Shrek.
King Harold II (a different King Harold to the one in Shrek, who, in this story, is King Harold III) of Far Far Away was a good king. He also had a habit of giving his children adjectives for names, he called his son Prince Charming and his daughter Princess Sexy.
Every year, someone takes a golden Apple from Harold’s tree, so he calls on his gardener and his 3 sons to watch it. His 2 older sons fall asleep, but the youngest one, called Handsome (for the gardener had taken name inspiration from King Harold), noticed a Phoenix taking the Apple.
King Harold wanted the Phoenix , so the 3 sons went in pursuit of it. They c…
Before Lord Farquaad was ruler of Duloc, a baron and baroness was in charge. Baron and Baroness Von Hellman. But the Baron, Lucien Von Hellman died. How? I don’t know, but it made his widow extremely upset. Before he died, Narcisa Von Hellman, the widow, had a child through him, which she called Estella, or Ella for short. Not wanting her to be obsessed with wealth and power, Narcisa gave Ella to her maid, Catherine Miller, to raise.
Years later, Narcisa was bitter over the loss of her husband and only child. Little did she know that Ella had come back by attending her anniversary party. When she did, she made up a lie that the Baroness’s Dalmatians had killed her adoptive mother, but in fact, it was rogue dogs. Despite this, Narcisa gave h…
In Duloc Hills, there was a mean witch called Queen Bianca aka The Wicked Ice Queen, who ruled over a piece of the land called Cooper’s. She had a twin sister called Queen Cinderelsa the Ice Cream Queen, who worked in Sweetsville.
In Duloc, there were 2 siblings, called Kai and Ellie, who lived with their maternal grandmother after their parents passed away. One night, when they both were in bed, an evil mirror broke into a million pieces and one piece got into Kai’s heart, turning him into a nasty person. He was eventually lured into Queen Bianca’s palace and forced to mend the mirror.
Ellie set out to find him, getting into all kinds of mishaps, including incidents with a robber girl who looked remarkably like Little Red Riding Hood and Qu…
Note: This story is about the Rumpelstiltskin on the Wanted Posters from the Shrek 2 PC game. The ending of this story takes place at the beginning of Shrek 2.
In King Midas’s kingdom of Ormond, there lived a warty magic-using goblin named Rumpel Stiltskin. He had green skin with warts (due to being born to a witch in Far Far Away’s Crone’s Nest), a blue hat and blue clothes. He liked to spin yarn.
One day, he was summoned by King Midas.
”Rumpel, I would like you to go to the playground outside Ormond Primary School and spin some of the yarn that the children have there,” he requested.
And off Rumpel went. He spun the yarn perfectly and quickly, no matter HOW much there was. He also helped the kids with their HOMEWORK as well. Well, he THOUGHT…
Note: In honour of Cruella coming to cinemas this weekend, I decided to do how 101 Dalmatians happened in Shrek.
In one house in the Far Far Away Kingdom, there lived 2 adult Dalmatians, Pongo and Missis, who live with their “pets,” Roger and Anita. Pongo and Missis are expecting puppies, which they were excited about, but then, Anita’s schoolmate, Cruella DeVil (formerly Estella Von Hellman) came and attempted to take Missis so she could shave her puppies’s fur off (for she was against killing), but Roger kicked her out of the door.
Soon, the puppies were born, 50 of them. One night, when they were children and watching their favourite TV show, about their hero, Ball, Pongo told them to get off the bed, which they did. However, Cruella came…
Karen is a Dulocian who lives near the Magic Faraway Tree in Duloc Hills. She LOVES the tree and is one of its frequent visitors.
Note: This story is dedicated to my mother, who LOVES the Magic Faraway Tree series by Enid Blyton.
In the countryside of Ryall, Grasmere in Duloc Hills, there was a magical tree called the Magic Faraway Tree, where lots of creatures live. Their leader was a man with a moon shaped face, called Moon-Face. A fairy also lived there called Silky. In her house in the tree, you can slide to the bottom of the tree on a cushion and at the bottom, a delightful squirrel asks for the cushion.
2 other people in the tree are the Saucepan Man, who is covered in saucepans and often mishears you, and Good Ol' Whatsisname, who no one knows the real name of.
At the top of the tree, several cloud lands come and go. Some of these cloud lands include: The Land of…
Next to a farm on the outskirts of Far Far Away, there lived a woman named Miss Tabatha Gulch. She was a sweet kindly woman with a bad reputation. She was a fan of Survivor and Burning Heart and Eye of the Tiger were her 2 favourite songs. She was thought of being cruel to animals. Heck, she was even rumoured to even try to have the farmer's dog killed.
When a tornado hit Far Far Away, Tabatha took shelter at the Fairy Godmother's factory. There, the Godmother had her turned into an ugly witch, which Tabatha didn't like, so with everything that happened to her, she became what everyone thought of her, the Wicked Witch of the West.
Tabatha caught up with the farmer's house, which had been taken to the Land of Oz. When she met Dorothy, she was…
Since Fairy Godmother had a storybook called Pretty Woman in her library and also because I was talking about it on YouTube, I figured I would give my two cents on how it happened in Shrek.
Mr Edward Prince was a magic-user in Far Far Away and as such, he was a teacher in the magic school, teaching pupils such as Mandy Gothel and the girl from the Magic Finger. But eventually, his class began to be disruptive and naughty and the school thought that EDWARD was the cause and as such, they fired him.
On the way home after the firing, he met a princess named Vivian who was standing on a street corner singing Back to Life by Soul 2 Soul. He asked her why she was doing that and she said that she had a dream of being whisked away by a knight in sh…
Let’s tell an old story anew, and let’s see how well you remember it:
Once, in Far Far Away, there was a young girl with lots of hair named Mandy Gothal, who excelled in magic in the local magic school, where she was teased for her long hair. After graduating, she got the title of Dama for her excellence and moved next door to a rich couple. She grew lots of magical vegetables, including Rapunzel.
One night, the husband of the next door couple snuck into Gothal’s garden and was about to take some of the Rapunzel when Gothal caught him. She allowed him as much of the vegetable as possible, out of the kindness of her heart, which he was grateful for. Out of gratitude, he made her his child’s “Hairy Godmother.”
The couple had the child, who they…
Lily Goggins is an film that Shrek and his family went to see in Far Far Away. It is a parody of Mary Poppins.
Queen Lillian (Shrek) as Lily Goggins
Since the creation of Ricky Rat in my Pied Piper story, I have been obsessed over making sure he has as much stuff based around him as Mickey Mouse does since Ricky is a parody of him, so here’s the Disney Parodies logo that has Ricky’s logo on.
And here’s Ricky’s nightclub, the Hat of Rat.
When Lord Farquaad was getting used to ruling Duloc, rats started infesting Duloc Hills. When it was getting worse, Farquaad hired someone to get rid of them. That "someone" was a selectively mute piper named Jeremy the Pied Piper. He managed to get rid of them by playing his enchanted flute which attracted them and forced them to dance along and luring them to faraway waters.
However, Farquaad wouldn't "pay the piper," so years later Jeremy got revenge by piping all the children away (while playing the song Someday My Prince will Come) and luring them far far away. Farquaad found out about this and evicting Jeremy from Duloc when he evicted the other fairytale characters. Poor Jeremy was sent to a swamp where he enchanted the rats there to…
In a temple in Duloc Hills called Ivory Temple, lived a pink-haired fairy called Toothella Meanstooth. She was a Tooth Fairy. This meant that she collected baby teeth from every single child. She takes them when the child places them under the pillow and she replaces them with a shiny gold coin. Toothella did this with every young Dulocian.
One day, she received a call from a Duloc parent saying that their little girl, Alexandra Clare Cynder, was a tomboy who didn’t believe in fairies, so Toothella set out to prove Alexandra wrong. She woke Alexandra up during the night and took her for a wild adventure. At first, Alexandra was hesitant, but she followed along anyway. They went in a closet in Ivory Temple where the tooth fairies kept the ba…
Before the twentieth year Fiona met Shrek who rescued her, She as an ogre at night finds herself not from her tallest and highest tower in a castle, but in a cabinet from the internet, an online community where human beings shop, play games, and socialize. There, she met and befriended the Disney Princesses, because She's a princess as well.
- Disney Princesses
- Snow White
- Fa Mulan
- Vanellope von Schweetz
- Jaq and Gus
- Perla and Suzy
Fiona as an ogre was still asleep in her highest and tallest tower, that night at 7:00 pm, when she woke up for she had heard a weird sound that had never been heard before. She saw a tile sitting on a floor tile in the middle of …
Note: Because WilsonHydetheThird put this story on his “Fairy Godmother Tragedy Library” a while back, I figured I might as well give my two cents on how I think it happened in Shrek.
After Prince Charming’s apparent death, an artist named Basil Hallward moved in the Fairy Godmother’s cottage, turned the factory into an painting factory and painted a picture of Charming, but called it Dorian Grey. “Dorian Grey” suddenly came to life and wished his portrait would age without him in it. He went into Far Far Away and met Sybil, the daughter of Rapunzel and Lancelot, who became smitten with him and called him by his real name. Rapunzel finds out and tells her daughter that if Charming comes near her, she will kill him for not seeking her out af…
A year ago, it was suggested that I adopt the wiki since the only bureaucrat, Davidjimnez, had been gone for two years. It was something I agreed needed to be done but had other wikis that needed help more. And then COVID-19 went on its global tour and I pretty much kissed last year goodbye.
Thankfully, there wasn't much of a need to have extra staff on hand. I'm an admin here and that was enough to keep any problems that occurred from getting too far.
Sometime between last March and today, Davidjimnez's account became disabled. It's unlikely he would come back with a new account in order to provide sufficient proof he's the same person to regain his bureaucrat and admin rights on the wikis he had them. It is no longer possible for anyone to…
Because it was Valentines Day yesterday, I decided to do how the Shrek version of the Frog Prince happened.
King Midas of the medieval Kingdom of Cortex had 2 children, Princess Midas and Prince Harold. Zoe was set to rule Cortex while Harold, being the youngest, was expected to find love in another kingdom.
One day, while walking near a lily pond in the Kingdom of Far Far Away, a witch turned him into a frog, which got him the nickname “The Frog Prince.” Harold had to seek refuge in the lily pond, where he met a female toad. They dated, but broke up.
One day a Fairy came to visit Harold and said she could turn him human and arrange for him to marry the Princess of Far Far Away in exchange for her son’s hand in marriage to his daughter. The F…
Newt Scamander, a wizard of Far Far Away, travelled by boat to Norway, so he can find some magical beasts there. His first stop was a bank, where he saw the Queen of Norway, Queen Mary Lou Clayton, who was speaking out negatively toward magic. Newt also met a No-Maj called Jacob Kowalski, but he accidentally left a dragon egg near him.
Jacob was there to open up a bakery, but the banker wasn’t impressed with his backings. While exiting, he got exposed to the wizarding world by Newt and thought it was amazing. Newt was then taken to the Norwegian Ministry of Magic, where he met Percival Graves, who was also spending time with the adopted Princess of Norway, Elsa Clayton.
Elsa was mistreated by the Queen because of her abilities to do magic. P…
Shrek will never get a Reboot, NBCUniversal and DreamWorks will stay the same.
Before reading this, all measurements and calculations of speed are done at the end, where the walking speed of an average human is then converted to fit Shrek's proportions. If you solely want to read the statistics and not the reasoning, skip to the end where it will be separated by a line, just like this one.
This is where we convert
Now it's time to Shrek these Halls. Converting the human speed into ogre speed, I was able to find statistics on steps someone makes per mile. Someone who is 6'4" takes 2018 steps per mile, and that someone who is 6'5", takes 1992 steps per mile. Doing some simple calculations [(1992/2018)x(1992)] we get an answer of 1966 steps per mile, for a person who is 6'6". Repeating this calculation several times, we g…
Long ago, Duloc Hills had a chiefdom. The ruler of that chiefdom was Chief Powhatan. His daughter was called Rebecca, who he had nicknamed “Pocahontas.” Powhatan had arranged for Pocahontas to marry Kowatan, but she did not want to get involved in an arranged marriage, nor did she want to be chief.
One day, a captain called John Smith (who was Prince Charming’s cousin and son of Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother) came from Far Far Away to Duloc Hills to gather treasure from there. While there, he met Pocahontas, whom he fell in love with. Pocahontas tried to stop him from stealing treasure, but he stated he had no choice since his father, who was a king, had died and his mother only had magic to keep herself afloat. Soon, the chiefdom and Smith’…
I did this display at work based on Wilson Hyde’s story on Peter Rabbit due to the new film coming out next year.
For anyone who wants to decorate their Christmas trees with
pretend real fairies.
I'm trying to edit a page, and while it does bring up the edit button, I cannot seem to add or remove text.
Harry was sent to collect his cousin Dudley from his friend’s house, but he knew where Dudley REALLY was, bullying younger kids at the local playground. On their way back, they were attacked by Dementors, which Harry cast the Patronus at. Mrs Figg, the Dursley’s neighbour came and revealed herself to be a Squib and watching Harry under Dumbledore’s orders. She took them back home, where Uncle Vernon demanded an explanation. During it, a letter came and it said that Harry had to go to a hearing about his use of underage magic.
After he had been sent to his room, the Order of the Phoenix came and collected him and took him to the Weasleys. During Harry’s hearing, Mrs Figg came and testified for Harry, and with her and Dumbledore’s help, Harry…
Once upon a time, there was an Emperor named Harold. He was only Emperor through marriage to his wife, Empress Lily. They both ruled an empire near Far Far Away.
One day, two sneaky tailors from Far Far Away Home Stores (FFAHS) came to the Empire to tell Harold that they could weave a new outfit that only smart people could see. Everyone thought that Harold would be fooled by this, but Harold was smart. He came up with a plan and told them they could make it. After the tailors left, he made himself a body suit, which took until the tailors came back to make. He put the body suit on and pretended to fall for the tailors’s plan. He walked around the empire’s town and no one said anything, but then a child named Hans said that he wasn’t wearin…
Any other Shrekists around here? I believe the Ogrelord is a god, and you can't convince me otherwise. Even if you're not, are any of you familiar with any aspects of Shrekism, such as Drek or Shrek is love Shrek is life? If you want, you can even try to join my religion online. Just reply in the comments!
I’ve had this question in my head for a long time now and you don’t know HOW long I’ve wanted to do a blog about it, but here I am, asking it. So why DIDN’T she turn Pinocchio into a donkey like the Coachman almost did in Pinocchio (Disney film)?
One Christmas, Bathilda Kroft was walking home from a magic school in Far Far Away for winter break when she saw her neighbours, the Gregg family, shooting pig fairies to hang on their Christmas trees. She yelled at them and they told her to mind her own business, which got her cross and made her put a spell on them using her magic finger, which caused 4 pig fairies to fly round their house that night.
The next morning, they woke up finding themselves as pig fairies! Mrs Gregg kept laughing and snorting as she had a laughing problem. They flew outside and then, 4 humanoid pig fairies took over their house, forcing them to seek refuge in a tree. They had to drink chicken soup, with Mrs Gregg singing "Walking in a Winter Wonderland" in an old…
Vanessa, the employee at the Aquarium of the Lakes, was upset about the Prince of Denmark marrying the Mermaid. She really liked him and he didn’t care about her “lower status.” Anastasia (the red-headed Mermaid from the beginning of Shrek 2) was also upset about her failed attempt at romance by kissing the green ogre.
One day, Anastasia came upon the surface of the river next to the Aquarium, saw Vanessa and fell in love at first sight. Vanessa saw her too and fell in love with her. She took her from the ocean and tried to take her to a witch from the land to turn her human, but it was raining, so they got lost and Anastasia was getting frustrated.
“Oh, for crying out loud!” She said.
“Fine,” Vanessa said, handing her the keys, “YOU drive!”
bill: steve did you sleep well last night?
steve: (yawns) No , I thought was was gonna die tommorow, which would be today.
bill:okay do you have ur netherite sword
steve: yup, I got netherite sword, beef chops, totems of undying, armour everything!
general mac: alright guys, Less talking! We need to not lose our position sliding through here!
John jacob jingleheimer schmidt: (whispers) guys, we need to sneak there quietly.
general mac: (whispers) of course.
(troops sneak into castle. )
Guards of castle: hello, How may I help you.
john jacob jingleheimer schmidt: we would like to come for a tour of the castle.
gaurds fo castle: sure, have a nice tour!
(soldiers march into castle quietly)
general mac: okay, just get into the place that say…
Mr. and Mrs. In Boots are the parents of Puss in Boots. They work as funeral directors and as such, organised the funeral for their son when he died. They only appear in my dream last night.
I watched Shrek 2 tonight because it was on TV and when the 2 elf workers turned into Lumiere and Cogsworth, I started thinking: Do those 2 names apply to the elf workers too? If not, why call the candelabra and clock those names? Would they be nicknames based on what they turned into? Please let me know in the comments.
Once upon a time, there was a Norwegian widowed Queen Regnant of the Kingdom of Arendelle called Arianna Stasia who had 12 sons, but wanted a daughter. One day, an ordinary looking woman (who was really a witch who looked like a troll) promised her a daughter in return for her sons. Queen Arianna said she didn’t care what happened to her sons as long as she had her daughter.
The next day, the sons were gone, but Arianna had 2 conjoined twin girls. She called the black-haired one Snow White and the red headed one Rosy Red. The 12 sons were trapped in one of the royal portraits and when Arianna saw that portrait, she was shocked. She wanted her sons back, but she would not for some time.
Arianna took her daughters to Norbreck Castle Hotel in B…
Mr and Mrs Twit were 2 ugly old people who live in a caravan in the Crone’s Nest in Far Far Away. Their caravan was numbered 281. They love to play tricks on each other, like putting worms in their spaghetti and putting frogs in their beds. Every Friday, they had Rabbit Pie, so they stuck Super Glue in their rabbit field so they could catch the rabbits.
One Friday, a rabbit called Flik the Roly-Poly Rabbit came and warned the rabbits not to go into the field. Mr Twit came and saw the rabbits laughing outside the field, so he put Super Glue there, but Flik warned the rabbits about THAT. Mr Twit came outside to see the rabbits laughing AGAIN. He and Matilda Twit went to get guns.
While they were gone, the rabbits turned everything in their liv…
Note: I'm doing this story because it's Roald Dahl Day this Sunday.
There was once a Norwegian-English boy called Yope who had an eccentric grandmother who told him all about witches. After Yope's parents's death, he started living with his grandmother. She told him everything about witches, that they all had green skin, they hate children, have big nostrils, and to them, children smell like fresh dog's droppings.
After the grandmother got ill with pneumonia, they had to have a holiday at Norbreck Castle Hotel in Blackpool. When they got there, Yope got curious and explored the room where the RSPCC were going to have their meeting with his little mouse, which he called Stuart Little. When they got in the room, they removed wigs and masks to …
The Global Ogre War was getting more and more brutal, to the point where more and more soldiers were needed. Eventually, soldiers from all over the world were needed, including China. One such Chinese family, named Fa, had an elderly man who had served in many battles and he was called upon to help defend China against Maximus Daauqraf. His eldest daughter, Fa Mulan, tried to convince him not to go, since he will die, but he rebuffed her, saying he will die knowing he did the right thing.
Mulan then decided to fight in her father’s place. She bought the necessary equipment and dressed like a man, named Fa Ping. “He” managed to get through the training in the Pleasure Training Field flawlessly and proved to be War material.
Soon, it was War t…
Queen Katrina of Duloc was Fiona and Nancy’s mother who, along with King Liam, locked them both in the tower and lied to their subjects that they were both human. Eventually, Queen Katrina died along with King Liam and left the kingdom in Lord Farquaad’s hands.
Harry to find out that he is descended from royalty through his maternal great-uncle and about his paternal uncle, John Barrowman.
Dolores Umbridge to be nice and sweet
Hogwarts Castle to be lofty.
The Time-Turner to be a Deathly Hallow.
Finding out that Death created the first Time-Turner ever.
Harry woke up from a nightmare at the Weasley’s tent. He was staying there for the Quidditch World Cup at the Far Far Away Pavilion. Suddenly, many of Voldemort’s supporters were attacking. Just then, the Dark Mark appeared in the sky, which made the supporters panic.
After that, it was time to go back to Hogwarts, where Dumbledore Explained about the Triwizard Tournament, where one student from each of the 3 schools (Hogwarts, Beauxbatons and Durmstrang) must compete in. He also explained the Goblet of Fire, where the students put their names in. He also introduced the students from Beauxbatons and Durmstrang.
On Halloween, Harry’s name unexpectedly came out of the Goblet, which was shocking, since he DIDN’T put it in. He had to compete.
It was 31st July 2003 and Harry was stuck in 4 Privet Drive, Far Far Away (as usual), but this time, it was worse. Uncle Vernon’s Sister, Marjorie Trunchbull was visiting. When she visited, she kissed Petunia and hugged Dudley. At dinner-time, she insulted Harry’s parents, which caused him to lose control of his magic and blow her up. Harry packed up and left. Suddenly, a strange bus came and the conductor introduced himself as Stan Shunpike. Harry went in and was baffled by the unusual ride. Soon, they reached the Leaky Cauldron, where Harry spent the rest of the summer. At one point, he thought he saw a blue-dressed fairy ordering liver. One night, he heard that the escaped prisoner he heard about on TV, Sirius Black, was after him.
Kit Charming Fortuna, aka Prince, later King Kit Charming, is the half-brother of Prince Charming and the current King of an unknown Kingdom.